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Are Social Media DMs the new Spam folder?

If you’ve sent me a private message over Facebook, Instagram or Twitter lately..there is almost a 100% chance I didn’t see it. Much like my spam folder, I’ve completely stopped checking my social media direct message inboxes.  I swear to god, if I get one more wrap distributor direct messaging me on Instagram about joining her team, I might scream. Between the Beachbody coaches randomly friending me and then sending several messages about becoming a coach… or the incessant automated DMs on Twitter…I’ve just started to drown it all out. I officially hate my DM folder. Can I just go ahead and delete it please? It’s worthless.


I’m just going out on a limb here, but I think the actual purpose for DMs is to actually have a private conversation with someone on a public platform. It’s totally normal to be interacting with a person online and want to have a quick chat about something in private. I get that….but what’s happened is that direct sales companies are now taking advantage of these offline messaging channels and completely abusing them. Some companies are even recommending the DM method in their outreach teachings!  There is a reason direct sales have a bad wrap…and this is proof positive!

Anyone else tired of getting auto generated DMs on social media? Click To Tweet

Sending a random person a private message to peddle your products, seems so impersonal, so robotic. You know that the only goal they have in mind is to sell you something. They don’t care about you. They don’t care about what you do..they only want to take advantage of you.


Take a look at some of the messages I receive on daily basis across all platforms. How much do you want to bet that they are sending out these messages to anyone and everyone on their list? Imagine if their DMs were posted on their public wall? It would look like an entire profile of SPAM.

Maybe it’s because I’m a touchy feely kind of person…maybe it’s because I use social media to actually connect with people. But it seems like a better approach for all of the wrap peddlers and Shakeology drinkers would be to get to know me first, interact with me, start a conversation that has NOTHING to do with your business. Because I could care less about your business..but I might care about you…and if I start to care about you as a person, then I’ll want to see you succeed and then I’ll consider supporting your business? See how that works? You need to start a relationship before you go in for the sell.

Death to the DMs!

Do me a favor, if you agree with this post, please share it! Maybe together we can put a stop to the automated social media DMs!


Chrystie is a mom of 3 kids and wife to one. She's sold 4 blogs in the last 10 years and now helps other women start their blogging empire. Her love for really bad reality TV is only trumped by her love for margaritas without salt. Her other addictions include spray painting everything gold and embarrassing her kids at the bus stop. #thatmom

This article has 7 comments

  1. Jessica

    So agree with you… I’ve been wanting to write a blog about accepting my post-baby body and how I’m getting over the need to be skinny again… and I’m afraid to, because I feel like the minute I publish it, I will be bombarded with “I can help you!!! here’s this wrap and these greens!!!” and….. NO. I’ve already been DM’d a few times. Sometimes I respond back with a no thank you, sometimes I ignore it. They really annoy me.

    • Abbie

      Yeeeeeeeeessssssss!!!! I just started responding “This IS my after body. You should have seen my before.” Etc. It is seriously ridiculous.

  2. Lindsay

    Oh my gawd, thank you for saying every single thing that I’ve ever wanted to say about those annoying wrap people on Insta! They are so irritating!! I just don’t understand how there are SO MANY OF THEM and yet they all talk about how much money they’re making. It just doesn’t make any sense since everyone I know ignores them.

  3. Shaunacey

    It is seriously driving me CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    I hate when I ‘like’ someone’s pic and then they send me a DM “thanks for liking my pic… Wanna join this limited time opportunity. I only have 2 spots left… blah blah blah”
    Simply Shaunacey

  4. Rachel

    This is my current life struggle… I AM SO SICK OF THE ‘it works’ DMS and all the other ones out there. I am no longer clicking ‘accept’ and then sending a nice little message back. I’m done (dropping the mic).

    • Chrystie

      Me too! I’ve stopped following anyone that has MLM all over their insta!

  5. Elle Beau

    Absolutely agree with you – I have linked this article in a current anti-MLM piece I am writing (with full credit back to you, of course). I hope more and more people see this, and network marketers STOP with the cold-messaging.

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